Blogging Burnout: The Messy Middle Before The Breakthrough

I was listening to a Brene Brown podcast this week, and she said something that stopped me. She talked about how the most powerful stories are the ones told from the middle. Not after the breakthrough. Not when everything is wrapped up with a pretty bow. But right in the messy middle, when you are exhausted, stretched thin, and still trying to show up.

That is exactly where I am right now.

I’ve taken a few weeks off from writing or working on Feelings-Based Phonics because I’ve been struggling with burnout. There is a lot going on in my life and I feel like I’ve been operating at forty percent in every area even though I am doing everything at a hundred percent effort. I’ve been a mediocre mom, a mediocre teacher, a mediocre partner, a mediocre friend. Even cleaning the house or remembering to fold the laundry feels like climbing a mountain. I’m tired. I’m stretched. I’m carrying more mental and emotional weight than I want to admit.

Trying to teach full-time, mom full-time, build a side hustle full-time, and handle family things behind the scenes has left me feeling like I am falling short everywhere. Self-care has been nonexistent. My healthy eating habits and workouts have disappeared. And I can feel how much that has affected my mental health. I stopped writing. I stopped creating. I even stopped doing the small things that help me feel like myself.

I stopped working on the side hustle recently because I knew I needed a break in that department to give myself a little grace and space. I also knew that I needed to get my health back on track or I will just continue to spiral. Health is the foundation, and always my top priority. I can’t do all these life things well without focusing on my health first.

I wasn’t going to share any of this, but listening to that podcast made something click. This might be exactly the part I am supposed to be sharing. The middle. The messy. The tired. The imperfect part of hustling through work, side hustle, and mom life when it’s really hard.

This right now is the hardest part of building something new. The part where you have been working for months and months (almost 7 to be exact), showing up over and over, and not seeing the reward yet. The part where the excitement of the beginning has worn off and you are still staring at a long road ahead.

I know side hustles are slow burns. I know the payoff comes later. But that does not make this season any easier.

And at home, I feel like I could be so much better if I was not running on empty. I want to be present with my husband and kids and patient with their little feelings, but I am tired. I want to have energy for fun things, but I am distracted. I want to feel proud of how I am showing up, but right now I just feel worn out.

Teaching does not make this season any lighter. It is the only profession where you have to work outside of work so you have work to do when you get to work. Planning, prepping, grading, organizing, communicating, copying, documenting. The list never ends, and it does not all fit inside the hours we are paid for. When you mix that with motherhood, a side hustle, and other life stuff, it just gets overwhelming at times.

So I’m stepping back and rebuilding slowly. I’m starting with the basics. Instead of trying to overhaul my entire life with a dramatic reset, I’m focusing on small choices. Building new tiny habits. Choosing food that makes me feel good. Movement that helps me feel strong. Getting outside more. More rest and presence than productivity. I’m giving myself permission to pause on the extra things until I have the energy for them again.

This season is shaping me in ways I can feel even on the hard days. This is not my first rodeo, and as much as I hate the hard seasons, they are always the ones that come with the most growth. So I’m letting myself move slowly through it, knowing that these low moments are never wasted and often become the very things that make me wiser and more grounded.

Let’s not lose our minds together,

Tori